autism – the silent inner voice?

an autistic person being very literal may recognise “self” first hand and have a conscious awareness of the division between self and ego perhaps not recognising the internal narrative of words sounding silently as a part of them

as a child they first hear the narrative and make the assumption this voice is seperate to them because it starts with the internalisation of social language which already feels alien to them

so this voice in their head now talking becomes their imaginary friend and the child stays seperate from the imaginary friend for much longer than a neuro-typical child would understand it this way, often reporting on what would normally be silent dialogues

the imaginary friend may not become integrated with an autistic person until much later, in some cases not at all

because an autistic person takes “self” more literally, has an experience “I know who I am, I am aware, I have an awareness that is me and I know this experience to be me” then the voice talking simply CANNOT be them and logically has to be a friend who nobody else can see

especially when the voice says “you know who you are, you are aware, you have an awareness that is you and you know this experience to be you”

that single ‘awareness’ being pointed to by the narrator is them and they literally cannot be two things at once, they are unable to accept this other aspect of themselves as being anything to do with them

so they have an imaginary friend who talks to them

and while it is not an auditory hallucination in the sense that they are hearing anything different to the rest of humanity, in a sense we are all ghosts thinking ourselves into being

and there lies the veil of consciousness hiding consciousness perhaps?

Anurajyati (be in love!)

mark ty wharton

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